Back to the daily thing

Well, not much to say here today, but I did have a wonderful weekend with my kids and Whendy on vacation. I loved being with them, it really felt like a family (i know we are a family, but it REALLY felt that way) I come back to work and all i can think about today is how am I going to make a living by doing art. I am still giving myself time to digest the changes, time to just work and be and adjust - but I will figure out a way to do it. I will make a living doing something that matters to people, doing something that will be good for me too. I am working on it. Let it be noted. I'd love to get involved with the community of art bloggers I have read, but how do I? I wlll make that effort today.
Oh, and my friend who I mentioned in last weeks post who's son was sick. He came out of the surgery, but they did find cancer. Anyone reading this please pray or send good energy or whatever it is you do to help others. I have hope that all will be fine with them.
all now.

Being Thankful

I think a lot about what I am thankful for, maybe more than most people, though I'm not sure. I just tend to be one of those very senitmental people who cry at touching commercials and cry when I am touched by someone's kindness. I have always been one of those "glass is half full" kind of people. Over the last year and a half, I have been through some very major changes - life altering changes. It was like when I hit 40, my whole world just turned topsy turvy, but in a good way. That's what I mean when I say I always can see the good in things. These changes I talk about include, death of a parent very dear to me, divorce, starting back to work after 10 years of being a stay home mom, realizations about myself that I had to work out in a lot of therapy that some of the people reading this will know about. But through it all, I feel that I've weathered it well. I have continued my belief that all things in life happen for some reason, namely to teach us lessons, but not solely. Sometimes we may not know why it is happening or may not know for years, but then one day we'll follow a chain of events to figure out that all of it is connected. It is in how you view the change (positive or negative) that determines how well you can survive it. This all sounds like a neat little package doesn't it? It sounds easy to just type it down. But sometimes in life things happen that I just have the hardest time with.
A friend just recently found out that her 7 yr old is very sick and must have a very serious surgery to hopefully save his life. He is in surgery right now. I want to believe that we are here to learn and be made into better, more caring, more thankful people. But even I have a hard time knowing why this had to happen, and wondering if this child will be ok. Children should not have to go through things like this. I do know one thing. I can't be thankful enough in times like these. Thankful for my children's good health, my own, my loved ones, and yes thankful for every day that goes by that I can enjoy with my kids and my dear W. I know that life is short, and any little stress that we think is getting us down, is not really that bad. I should be more thankful for those precious moments of happiness. I will try over this weekend to savor every moment I have with my family. and I will be thinking of my friend and praying for them to have the strength to get through the coming days. I know this is kind of sad, but I do think it is important for me to write. When I'm in the middle of the "stuff" of life, I will think, "see the big picture you idiot" don't get caught up in any things that take away from enjoying this precious time.

that's all for now.

Ok, here goes

Well, I figured it was time I put some artwork up on my blog for you to see. I am just starting this process, so bear with me. These are some of my latest ebay sales. They are all done on 6x6 pieces of found wood. I am experimenting with doing square images of birds right now., and mounting them on wood or painting directly on the wood. I shipped them out today. I have some more birds I painted this weekend. I hope to get them on the blog tomorrow. I hope you like them.
I had a productive weekend with my painting. The weather was beautiful and warm, with no humidity. I stayed outside literally all day on Saturday. I did yardwork with Whendy, then painted the rest of the afternoon. Then a friend came over and we went out for mexican and mararitas and came back home, then gave ourselves pedicures! What a riot Kim is. Earlier that morning, Whendy and I were doing some new yoga exercises(we are trying to be in better shape for the summer). The dogs were coming up and licking our faces and trying to play. I stood up to shoo them away. About that time, Whendy decided she would throw the hard plastic soccer sized ball across the room to distract them. Well, right when she threw it, I turned into the path of the ball(aka: hard object coming at warp speed). Needless to say it hurt, we laughed and couldn't get up. But thankfully, there is not visible mark this morning. I tend to be accident prone lately, like last weekend when the hot grease splattered on me.

A really beautiful Poem

I got this in an e mail from a friend way back in January. I keep it on my cubicle wall. I thought I would post it here.
Thanks, Cara.

May today there be peace within.
May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received,
and pass on the love that has been given to you.
May you be content knowing you are a child of God.
Let His presence settle into your bones,
and allow your soul the freedom to sing, dance, praise and love.
It is there for each and every one of us.

OK, so how do I go about letting other people know?

Another day and nothing to do at this job. It is killing my soul. I want to know what it is that the universe has for me. I have been through so much change, and I know I need to settle for a while, but I also want to be creative and vibrant. That is Me, really. I am that person, but I'm chained to the hamster wheel right now, the corporate world. Don't get me wrong, I love my life now. It is definitely headed in the right direction. My boys are growing so much, they delight me to see them changing and thriving. Well, the changing part is a little disturbing too, but I know that is what life is all about, change...
They are the best boys ever, really. They love me. They are doing fine through this divorce. They're happy. I want the world for them, the world that makes them feel they can get what their heart desires. the world where they feel confident and loving and where they never stop growing and learning and finding what it is that makes their heart sing! I want that for them. They will have it. I'm showing them what it means to go for what they need and want.

Back to me for a minute.... I am trying to make a decision, do I stay with the graphic design thing and wait for a better place with it, or do I go for a totally different career, one in healthcare, maybe even nursing? It is so promising for the opportunity to financially be stable. But am I cut out for it? Will I like it? I could work part time then so I could have for time for my art.
Or do I throw stability out the window and try to make it by selling my art, helping W out with her Art teaching business, teaching art myself, and generally wondering if I can make the rent? Do I go down that path and see where it leads me? It is not a decision I can make overnight, I know that. But I do believe that if I love it, I can make money with it. But do I love it enough? And would I like the people contact with nursing enough to do that? My mind just swirls and swirls with these questions. Big questions that need to be answered about the second act of this life. This life we only get for 80 years if we're lucky. We only have one chance at it. I will give myself time. I am just starting on the path. It is a new beginning. And I'm so happy I have W to share it with. She is my love. My soulmate. I do know that. I look forward to the end of the day to just hang out with her. I talk to her and share every feeling. She listens and validates those feelings. It is an amazing thing to find this kind of love at 40, or ever for that matter. It doesn't happen every day. I never had it before now and I am finally happy and at ease. Sometime in a future post, I'll tell you more about her.

New to this - not sure how it works

Well, I've never done this before, but I thought it might be a good way for me to document my new life, my real life that is. I'll explain more about that later, but for now, this is my fabulous front porch. I just love sitting out here drinking my coffee in the morning. I even have humming birds, yes, humming birds. I'll try to get shot of them soon for you. I am writing this as though someone might really read it. Don't know if they ever will.

I am going to start blogging to try and document my life changes I have gone through, and the hopeful more creative life I want to live. For those of you who don't know, I'm in the corporate world right now. I just went through a divorce and went back to work as a graphic designer in corporate america. It's not exactly fullfilling, but for now, it does pay the bills which is important. I hope to be able to make my living doing my art eventually. I'm working on it. For now, I have some things on Ebay. You can see them. Hopefull I can figure out how to link them here. I'll get back to you about that.